My friends recommended that I see this movie, and so one weekend I did. Actually, I kinda forced Joy into watching it.
I never imagined myself bearing a child. As a butch (the guy role-player) in our relationship, I envisioned myself to be the father figure. In my previous relationships, I have always wanted that one tiny body part that I knew I would never have. Until Joy came. She made me realize that we really don’t need it, as far as you-kn0w-what-I’m-talking-about part of our lives is concerned.
And so, watching this movie gave me a mix of emotions. Mostly anger.
This is a story about a lesbian couple of more than 18 years. Annette Bening (Nic) and Julian Moore (Jules) have 2 kids together, both from the same sperm donor, Mark Ruffalo (Paul). The kids got curious and contacted the cryobank and met with their biological father.
When the parents found out about this, they set up lunch for all five of them. Naturally, Nic (the butch in the relationship) felt alienated in the process. The kids suddenly have this father figure who took out their eldest daughter Joni on a motorcycle ride (which Nic strongly prohibits), and hang out with their son, Laser.
Jules, who is starting out a landscaping business, got entangled with Paul as he hired her services to beautify his lawn. They kissed. And f*cked. A lot of times.
This is the fucked up part with which I almost wanted to throw the remote control to the freaking TV. She says he appreciated her and her long-time partner didn’t. The blood-boiling scene was the very 1st time they did it and Jules was sitting at the edge of the bed while unbuckling Paul. When that thing was revealed, she said, and I quote “Oh hello there!” with extreme excitement.
And then they did it over and over. She even fired the gardener because she thought he knew and that he would eventually squeal. Nic, clueless of the infidelity but very much aware that she’s slowly her grip on her kids and her wife, finally gave in and tried to win everyone back by joining the “Paul craze” and arranged for everyone to have dinner at his place.
Only then, when she used his bathroom, did she find Jules’ hair on his drain. On his bed. I thought she would make a scene out of it. But she didn’t. What courage and composure she has. I would have done something more berserk. Haha.
Will she forgive her? Will Jules run away with Paul, now that they can build their own family?
I’m not spoiling it, in case you want to watch.
My point is that, why are women – at least in films, who have been in long term lesbian relationships, portrayed in such a way that the first male they encounter would suddenly become their f*ck buds? I mean, look at the L word.
But in gay films, one guy wouldn’t stumble upon a girl and suddenly want her pu**y that bad and say “oh hello there”, right?
Why do they always make it seem like it’s the end-all and be-all of womanhood?
In Joy’s opinion, this scene was shown because it’s a reality. It may have happened before to some lesbian couples. And it could happen again. The assurance she gave was that, “not every movie is about us”, and it stopped me dead in my tracks.
Of course, we are different. But somewhere in my mind, the question still lingers. Is her (I’m pertaining to Jules and the other women like her-regardless if they’re in a straight or gay relationship) urge stronger than her love for her partner to give in to that? Or did she think she would eventually be forgiven that’s why she risked it?
I don’t know. I’m not one to judge. What Joy and I do everyday, in our own little ways, is protect this relationship from anyone and anything.
THE KIDS ARE ALRIGHT. Watch it, and share your thoughts. =)